HOW TO GET OVER PHONE ANXIETY AND HAVE KILLER PHONE SEX

Do you still get the shakes when you see caller ID pop up? Thank your lucky stars every day that you can order food on an app now? But you still want to hear a beautiful woman's voice when you cum, don't you? So here's how you can kill that phone anxiety demon and call the PSO of your dreams!

​I know, I know. I'm a Gen Z kid. You don't have to tell me: talking on the phone kinda sucks sometimes, doesn't it?

You can't see the other person's face, so you don't know what they're feeling. If the connection is bad, you have to keep asking them to repeat themselves. And wouldn't it be easier to just send a text to say all this crap?

But hear me out: sometimes, picking up the phone and hitting "dial" is worth it.

Humans are social creatures. We need to interact with each other in order to function. They say that the earliest signs of civilization aren't the buildings or the agriculture, but the bones: ancient corpses have been recovered with broken, re-healed bones, meaning that the ones around them cared enough to help them recover.

And you know what the world's oldest profession is, right?

Hint: it has something to do with that thing between your legs.

So the world's oldest virtue is compassion, and the world's oldest profession is prostitution... It only makes sense that humanity found a way to combine the two.

Hence: phone sex!

But you're a little gun-shy, and that's okay. Use these 4 tips to hype yourself up for your first phone sex call.

1 - before you speak, read

The benefit to websites like NiteFlirt is that they give you the opportunity to read up on a Flirt before you commit to spending money on her.

Each listing you see here contains a complete profile written by the Flirt in question. You'll get to see her rates, her kinks, her likes and dislikes, her goodies, and more just by clicking on her ad, and it doesn't cost you a thing to browse!

Awkwardness can kill a conversation, and the quickest way to avoid that is by getting informed about the provider you're looking to call. There's nothing worse than calling for BBC cuckolding and getting told that the Flirt doesn't do raceplay under any circumstances. What's worse, you've wasted her time and annoyed her by being one of the many (many, many) customers who couldn't be bothered to just take five seconds and READ!

Trust me: if you take the time to look through a Flirt's profile first, you will stand out in her mind. It's even good practice to tell her something specific you liked about her profile when you first call her; she gets a boost knowing what parts of her profile get the most attention, and you put yourself ahead of the pack by confirming that you took the time to read the information she painstakingly put together.

2 - check out her goodies

On Niteflirt, each Flirt has the option to create "Goodies." These can be anything from photosets to mp3s to fun assignments and games to videos and more! You can browse goodies by clicking the "Goodies" tab at the top, or go to a Flirt's page and look at her goodies specifically.

Looking through a Flirt's selection of goodies gives you valuable information even if you don't choose to buy anything: you can see what type of content she usually creates, what she looks like, whether she enjoys expressing herself through video or through voice only, etc.

If you're not sure about whether or not you'd enjoy a Flirt's voice (and she doesn't have a free voice sample available like I do), buying a goody bag can get you over that first hurdle and tell you what the cutie you're eyeing up sounds like. You'll hear a little bit of her "style," how she talks, what trigger phrases she uses, and decide if a call would be a good next step.

3 - chat with her

Blessed be, NiteFlirt has changed with the times and added an option for those of us out there with phone anxiety! For .69 cents a volley, you can chat with a Flirt using the site's built-in chat function.

Now, before you get your dick out and start going at it on the cheap, let me make it clear: most providers don't see chat as something to replace calls, but to supplement them.

What does that mean? Well, here are some things you can use the chat function for...

• Introduce yourself. Say hi, give your name and a little bit of info about yourself and your kinks. If she's like me, she'll appreciate the heads-up, so she doesn't have to try and read your mind when you first get on a call.
• Ask about availability. If a flirt doesn't have a set schedule posted, you can use the chat to ask when she'll be around, or if she's currently able to take a call. Some Flirts stay logged in for chats around the clock even when their phone lines are off; utilize this!
• Check about kinks. Not sure that your fantasy is something the Flirt can provide? Chat is a great way to confirm before you spend money on pricey phone rates!
• Give feedback. Of course, you should always try to leave feedback through the official channels whenever possible, but you can also use chat to send that Flirt whose game you played or whose goody you loved a message telling her how much you enjoyed it. Telling someone you like something they made is a great icebreaker!

This is just a sampling of what you can use chat for. Some Flirts do offer sessions through chat where they'll get you off exclusively through words, but don't assume that everyone will. Each Flirt may have their own unique price for text-based sessions, to make up for the much lower per-message rates NiteFlirt provides.

The best practice if you want a Flirt's exclusive attention through chat? Tribute her. This shows you value her time, and aren't just trying to cheat the system and get all her attention for a fraction of the price. The exact amount varies depending on the Flirt and your budget, but whatever the amount, just making the effort to tribute for chat will endear you to your Flirt of choice.

4 - putting it into practice

So, you've read through profiles until you found a Flirt who looks to be providing exactly what you need. You've skimmed through her goodies, maybe even bought a few, and you can tell she's your type. It's like she walked right out of a wet dream and onto a web page. You've even sent a few flirty messages back and forth, and it seems like she's interested in hearing from you.

But you're still a little nervous. What do you say when you two connect? Do you just go right into it? What will she say? Do you have to say goodbye before you hang up? WHAT are the RULES?

Calm down, there, tiger! I know it seems intimidating, but just remember:

Your phone sex provider is human, too.

No matter what persona she picks, no matter how dominant or bratty or mean, your Flirt wants the two of you to have a good time talking together. That's what keeps you coming back, after all! So if you're polite, cordial, and respectful of her time and her talents, things will go just fine.

So what happens when that phone call connects, and you're left alone on the line with a beautiful woman for the first time ever?

Take a deep breath. Relax.

Greet your Flirt politely, and give your name right at the start so we know what to call you (other than bitch, slut, cumdumpster, etc.).

Your Flirt might take the lead immediately, asking you questions about yourself and your kinks to get you two started. (If you chatted before, you likely already went through this step.) Or she might wait for you to start talking, in which case, you should volunteer that information yourself.

Some things to think about, that your provider likely wants to know:

• What are your favorite kinks? The ones that really get you going? Not everyone has the same set of kinks, and not everyone who likes the same kinks like it in the same way, so be as specific as possible!
• What are your LEAST favorite kinks? You don't always think about this, but one man's trash is another man's treasure, and one man's kink is another man's "NO WAY!" If you have a thing against sucking cock or wearing panties or being called a faggot, now is the time to tell your provider. Better to get it out of the way BEFORE a scene gets ruined!
• Do you like to go back and forth, or do you just like to listen? Some men treat phone sex as a conversation, whereas others experience it more as a "live audiobook" type of thing. It's okay if you don't know which type you are! But if you do, then something as simple as letting the provider know you won't be saying much (but you will be listening) can work wonders to smooth things along.

Once you get all that out of the way, it's time to transition to the "scene." This could be a roleplay, or it could be something as simple as lying there jerking off while she screams obscenities at you. It all depends on the preferences you discussed with your Flirt.

I can't really guide you through this part, since it's different for everyone. Just let your heart (or another part of your body) be your guide! This should be the most fun step of all, so just lie back and enjoy yourself.

Do I have to say goodbye?

You're done. The gun went off. The cannon fired. The soldiers have left the building. You need a smoke and a cold shower.

What happens? Do you just... hang up?

Short answer: You can!

Longer answer: it really depends on your own phone sex "style." Since this isn't a "normal" phone call in the same way that calling your mother or ordering a pizza is, the rules are a little different. I have plenty of callers who never say goodbye, even if I'm in the middle of a sentence.

I understand it! Sometimes when you get off, you need that alone time in the end to compose yourself. And not everyone wants to keep paying money while they're lying there sticky and breathless.

So, no, you don't have to worry about saying "Excuse me? Thank you for the lovely session, miss, but I have to go now. Have a wonderful day!"

But you can. And I certainly always like to hear that I did a good job, if you know what I mean. You can even keep talking with your provider after you've cum, if you're so inclined! Lots of guys enjoy the pillow talk as they're coming down from their high. It's never necessary, but it can be a great way to further connect with your Flirt.

If you don't want to stay on the phone to give a proper goodbye, this is another thing you could consider using the chat function for! While you're too busy catching your breath to speak, send her a quick "Had fun, thanks!" through chat to let her know you didn't just end the call because you dislike her or got disconnected.

But however it starts and however it ends, just remember: you're the customer, your provider wants you to have a good time, and this process is meant to be fun for everyone involved. So just let loose and enjoy!

If all this has you riled up and in the mood for a call, why not make me your Flirt of choice? New customers get 3 free minutes with me by clicking below: